Hi. I have several older cousins who have children who are a bit younger than me. Although I do not see these cousins often (generally weddings, funerals, etc.) I would like to (and will) invite them to my wedding. I see their children as infrequently, or even less frequently – although years ago we all saw each other more frequently and were much closer. Is it Ok to invite some, but not all of the second cousins? Can I invite a sister (2nd cousin) without inviting her brother? (When we were closer, my relationship with the sister was much closer than with the brother) (BTW, the second cousins are all in their 20’s – 30’s). Thanks!

Donna, Wedding Queen, President; Top Wedding Sites, Inc

Well, typically we invite only those close to us to the wedding. So, my advice would be to invite the people you you really want attending. But, only you know the personalities of these family members and how they will all react. There’s no hard and fast rule on this.

Jacqueline Vazquez, Lifetime Events by Jacqueline Certified Wedding & Event Planner

I agree, the first thing you should decide is who do you want to invite to your wedding. If there are some distant cousins that make the guest list, but not others you are not obligated to invite them. As the moderator mentioned, you would know best their personality and how they would react. Don’t feel guilty if you don’t invite them. Remember the wedding is about the bride and groom, and having a great and happy day.

Donna, Wedding Queen, President; Top Wedding Sites, Inc

I’d like to add that while weddings are all about the bride and groom, we should always consider our guests feelings too. After all, without the guests there wouldn’t be much of a party! That being said, most people understand (or should understand) that there is usually a limit on how many guests can be invited and, so, we consider our relationships carefully.

Rebecca Black, Etiquette By Rebecca

I agree. You are not obligated to invite all if you want to invite a few. But, do consider each person’s feeling and those of their parents. Sometimes people don’t understand, even when they should. 😉