I am engaged and planning a wedding for a third marriage. I was telling my step mom my wedding plans and describing the dresses I had tried on when she voiced her opinion on my plans. We’re inviting approximately 100 people. I also want to wear a traditional gown. I know this is my third time but none of my family from my dad’s side attended either wedding before. My step mom stated that since it was my third wedding and his second that my wedding should be small and quaint and a traditional gown should be out of the question.I am finally at a point in my life where everything is going great except for some health issues. I am happy and want to share my special day with family and friends. My biological mom says I should do what makes me happy and if I am paying for it I shouldn’t let anyone’s opinion get to me or matter. I was thinking of an informal theme like a Hawaiian Luau. What am I supposed to do? 🙁

Thank you

Rebecca Black, Etiquette By Rebecca

Most weddings are encore events these days. So, the rule about encore events being small and intimate is outdated. Now, we wouldn’t go all out and expect multiple showers and wear a blusher veil. But, wearing a traditional wedding dress and inviting 100 guests is fine. Enjoy!

Donna, Wedding Queen, President; Top Wedding Sites

I agree. Since 9-11 and the war, there are many more people getting remarried. But do select a dress that compliments your theme, formality and (sorry) age. 😮 A dress for an informal luau might not be that formal white ball gown.

Erin Sharplin Love, Panache by Erin

I definitely think you should be able to wear whatever dress you choose to wear on your special day. However, I don’t suggest going all out by having multiple showers and parties, though.

Congrats and good luck!

Donna, Wedding Queen, President; Top Wedding Sites

I agree with Erin. A shower would be overkill and those guests who had been invited to previous showers wouldn’t need to bring another gift.