My daughter is getting married in November. Her bridesmaids are wearing wine, I am wearing navy blue, MOG is wearing champagne, one GMOB has chosen a black pant suit, and the other GMOB is still searching. The grandmother told my daugther that she would wait on the other grandmother to pick her color before she would choose hers.

Here’s the problem: The MOG told my daughter last week that she had purchased a navy blue pant suit for the grandmother to wear to the wedding. When my daughter reminded her that I was wearing that color, she said that it was no big deal, that we were too traditional, and she still refuses to switch colors even though my daughter asked her to. I am trying to be a peace maker. I have purchased another dress (hunter green) and am willing to return the blue dress. My daughter does not feel that we should give in because it is her wedding and her choice. She is, however, willing to compromise and allow me to switch colors. The question is, would it be appropriate for the grandmother to wear the same color dres as the mother of the bride? I don’t want to win or even be “traditional”, just correct. Any advice would be appreciated. I love your site and it has helped out so much in planning the wedding. Thanks!

Donna, Wedding Queen, President; Top Wedding Sites, Inc®, a wedding planning guide, and Recent Mother of the Groom –

I don’t see a problem with the grandmother wearing the same color as long as it is not more formal or upstages the mother of the bride. Since her outfit is a pants suit, and yours is a dress, I don’t think it should be an issue.

Rebecca Black, Etiquette By Rebecca

I agree. The grandmothers aren’t as much of an issue as the mothers are.