What is the proper amount when giving money as a wedding gift?

Donna, Wedding Queen, President; Top Wedding Sites, Inc®, a wedding planning guide, and Recent Mother of the Groom

There is no magic equation for giving a cash gift for a wedding. Forget what you’ve heard about covering the cost of your dinner (I can’t imagine how that rumor got started — how would you be aware of what your dinner costs?), or any other silly notion other than using your care and relationship (and your budget) as the deciding factor. In my opinion, shopping and sending the couple a gift is best, but if you’re not sure about what to choose and there is no gift registry, then sending a cash gift of your choosing is fine. Remember, a wedding invitation isn’t an invoice and you’re not buying a ticket to the wedding — give from the heart and you’ll always give a great gift!

Jay Remer, The Etiquette Guy, International Protocol and Corporate & Social Etiquette

I usually offer two pieces of advice. One, what is your financial situation; the second is how close are you to the couple? Give what you can based on your level of friendship and your personal finances. Some people simply cannot give money or a gift. In that case, a card with a heartfelt message will do very nicely. If you’re looking for numbers, I’d say $30 -$300 is a nice range. I dislike the use of arbitrary numbers as a general rule though. As long as your intention of good wishes accompanies the envelope, you’ll make the right choice.

Jodi R R Smith, The Mannersmith Etiquette Consulting
Author, The Etiquette Book, A Complete Guide To Modern Manners

I completely echo the advice you have been given. The amount depends on your budget (NOT on the cost per plate of the event) and your relationship wiht the couple. A Peace Corps volunteer might give a cousin a $50 gift while her sister, a banker, might give $200. For those right out of school, the range may be $25 – $100; while those who are older and have steady jobs may give gifts in the $75 – $250 range. In addition, the amounts given in metropolitan areas tend to be greater than those in suburban or rural areas. You certainly can ask around in your social circle for estimates to get an idea of what is typical for your neck of the woods. Good luck ~

The Guys Opinion

How much you give really depends on your relationship with the bride and groom. I typically recommend that if you’re a co-worker or a distant family friend or relative that $75 to $150 is fine. If you’re a relative or friend of the bride or groom then I’d say $150 to $200 is the range. Finally, if you’re a close relative or a close friend then you sould look to spend $150-$250. Also remember that if you are invited with a guest you should give a bigger gift since the couple is now hosting two guests rather than one.

I also did some research on TheKnot and they say if it’s a co-worker or not a close friend, spending at least $75-$100 on the wedding present. If you’re attending a relative or a friend’s wedding, the wedding website suggests somewhere between $100 and $125. TheKnot.com also took the pulse of what real brides and grooms have spent on weddings in the past in its registry study. Family members, meanwhile, spend on average of $146.